


Mother's Day

by Gigi_Sinclair



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-08
Updated: 2016-05-08
Packaged: 2018-06-07 04:20:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,415
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6784945
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gigi_Sinclair/pseuds/Gigi_Sinclair
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Leia knew they would never be taken alive.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mother's Day

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [Mother's Day 母亲节](https://archiveofourown.org/works/6798265) by [DisneySucks (Alucard1771)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alucard1771/pseuds/DisneySucks)



Leia knew they would never be taken alive. 

She knew it as Ben's mother—he's still Ben to her, always—and as a tactician. As strange as it seems, she wasn't convinced Ben was lost until he and Hux overthrew Snoke and took power for themselves. Prior to that, Leia was able to explain away Ben's atrocities—even the murder of his own father—as Snoke's influence. Once Snoke was dispatched, however, it was obvious he was no longer in charge. And it was clear she would never see her son again. 

“General Organa.” Kaydel Ko's voice is muted. They didn't want Leia to come. Not because she is old, but because of her personal investment in the mission. That's exactly why she has to be here. Her old friends Ackbar and Statura, the ones who have been to hell and back with her more times than she can count, understand. They know how tough she is. It's the younger ones who treat her with kid gloves. 

“Have you found them?” Leia barks. The palace is a maze, and all but deserted now. Her weapon is still drawn, but they haven't seen anyone since the first flurry of activity when, after a weeks' long siege, they finally breached the castle walls. 

“Yes, General.” Ko looks uneasy, and Leia knows. She knew before she left home.

“I want to see them,” she says, and Ko leads her through an ornate set of doors.

The throne room is extravagant. Emperor Hux's taste, Leia imagines, unless Ben really did change that much. Frescoes line the walls. The floor is tiled in red and white stones, which catch the evening light as it streams through the large transparisteel windows. The thrones themselves stand at the far end of the room, two huge chairs with velvet cushions. They are on a raised dais. On the steps in front of the thrones lie two bodies, one dressed in black, the other in bloodstained white. 

Ben is partly on top of Hux, as if he tried to shield him from the blast. Instead, he'd ensured they were killed by the same shot. Why didn't Ben use the Force to deflect it? Perhaps he was suffering a weakening of his powers. Perhaps they were truly taken by surprise. Or perhaps this was a deliberate act when they must have known there was no hope left.

Leia walks up to the dais, alone. Ko waits near the door, quietly. Laying down her blaster, Leia pulls Ben's heavy body to the bottom of the steps. 

She's always been jealous, a little, that Luke got to see their father before he died, to say good-bye. It's too late to do that here, but she removes Ben's mask anyway. The hydraulics hiss and she pulls it off to see the face of her little boy. 

He's scarred, but she knew that. It doesn't surprise her. There's a streak of grey in his hair, but he's in his mid-forties. That's not unexpected either. What Leia wasn't anticipating is the look of serenity on Ben's face. His eyes are shut and, if not for the bloody wound in his chest, she could believe he was sleeping. _Were you happy?_ She wonders, pushing a strand of hair from his forehead. _Are you at peace?_ She'll never know. 

She moves Hux's body as well, pulling it down to lie beside Ben's, leaving a gruesome trail of blood on the steps behind him. Hux is a villain of the worst sort, power-crazed and evil. He seduced her son more completely than Snoke ever did. _Snoke stole him from me,_ Leia thinks, looking at this slender man in his finely tailored clothes. _And you stole him from Snoke. So what does that make us?_

But there's nothing to be gained by lingering here. It's too late. Leia leans down to kiss Ben, very briefly on the cheek. He's still warm. She is about to leave when, on impulse, she moves Ben's hand on top of Hux's. That is what Ben would want. His actions and choices prove it. Her feelings are irrelevant. 

“Cremate them,” she says, as she passes Ko. “With dignity.” Leia trusts her to carry out the order.

She needs some air. The palace is surrounded by elegant gardens; Leia will take a turn there, she decides, to collect herself. Then she'll return to the ship and leave this place. On her way outside, she rounds a corner and runs almost directly into a child. 

It's a boy. It's been a long time since Leia had anything to do with children, and she finds it difficult to guess his age. Seven, perhaps, or maybe eight. He has thick dark hair and pale skin. _A page boy?_ Leia wonders. _The child of some servant?_ He seems unusually well-dressed if that's the case.

“Good evening.” The boy doesn't seem frightened when he speaks to her. His accent is Hux's, the voice of the Empire. “I'm looking for my parents.”

“Who are they?”

“His Imperial Highness and Lord Ren.” 

Leia steps back, startled. Looking more closely, she can see the boy bears a slight resemblance to Ben. There are many non-traditional options for those who wish to have children, of course, but it never occurred to her that Ben might have wished it. Or that he and Hux had any interest in being some sort of family. 

“I'm sorry,” Leia says, then stops. When she was told of her parents' death, she wanted honesty, not prevarication, but she was considerably older than this boy at the time. “They're...they can't be with us any longer.” She gives him what she hopes is an encouraging smile. “My name is Leia.” 

“Leia.” The boy repeats. “You're a princess.” 

“That's right.” In another life.

“My father told me that.” Ben spoke about her to his child? Leia is touched, even though she's not at all sure she wants to know what he said. “I'm a prince.” 

“What's your name?” 

“Anakin.” Of course. Leia should have guessed it. “My father said that you would come one day. When they were dead.” So, no prevarication then. “He told me you would take me away.” 

“What?” 

“I'm to stay with you, and behave myself.” Anakin draws himself up, a tiny soldier. “I'm not to cry much. My father doesn't wish that. But maybe just a little would be all right. That's what he said.” 

This is impossible. “No. I'm sorry. I can't.” Leia is an old woman. She can't take in a child who's been raised with values very different to her own, even if he is her grandson. 

_Grandson._ It's a word she never thought she would say. 

“I'll gather my things,” Anakin says regally, a miniature emperor. Then he adds, “May I bring my model space ships?” And at that moment, he sounds like a little Ben. 

Leia wonders what it was like between them, when Ben was alive. Did he love the boy? Teach him? Play with him the way Han used to play with Ben, chasing him through the halls and gathering him up, shrieking with joy, to kiss him and tickle him and throw him in the air? What kind of father was Ben?

“Yes, of course,” she says to Anakin. Then, wanting to offer him the chance she never had with any of her parents: “Would you like to say good-bye to them?”

As they return to the throne room, Leia is pleased she placed Ben and Hux in a quasi-affectionate pose. _Did he see affection between them in life?_ She wishes there wasn't quite so much blood, or that she'd at least closed Hux's eyes. 

Anakin stands stoically at their feet, his small mouth set in a grim line. Leia's heart goes out to him. She rests a hand on his shoulder, and, to her surprise, he shifts closer, pressing himself against her side. 

_Take care of him._ The words echo in Leia's mind, as clearly as if they were spoken aloud. It's Ben. Leia recognizes him easily, even though she hasn't heard his real voice since he was a child himself. _Take care of him_ , Ben says again. _Please. Do better this time._

Anakin begins to cry, a quiet, dignified sniffling. Tears spring to Leia's eyes. She doesn't let them fall, but she hugs Anakin against her, tightly. He hugs her back. _Yes_ , she thinks. She projects the words as loudly as she can, hoping Ben can hear her. _Yes. I will._


End file.
